Remember Mia by Alexandra Burt

Author:Alexandra Burt [Burt, Alexandra]
Language: eng
Format: epub, azw3
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Published: 2015-07-06T23:00:00+00:00

CHAPTER 16

Dr. Ari takes in a deep breath and rests his folded hands in his lap. “You found Mia’s blanket in the attic. Tell me what you did next.”

“I don’t know why I’m so . . . so afraid.”

Afraid is not the right word. Paralyzed, maybe? No, paralyzed means “incapable of movement.” Transfixed? Yes, transfixed, as in motionless, spellbound in a way. But by what I cannot say. Why do I feel as if I’m a hare mesmerized by the curved talons of an eagle? Something I can’t quite put my finger on, a complicit state of silence, an almost Manchurian conspiracy wall I feel I’m not allowed to climb. Like a promise I had made, a promise of silence.

“Fear is an autonomic response, don’t allow it to distract you. You can’t get to the bottom of it unless you let it run its course. Just accept it, but don’t make it more than it is.”

He pushes Mia’s blanket toward me. My hands move but then hesitate slightly. I grab the blanket and I know that I have to search for all the jagged pieces of the puzzle. I close my eyes and enter the elevator.

I hold the blanket as if it is a relic, a sacred object. It still smells like Dreft and baby lotion, but more than its scent its energy travels through my fingertips, up my arms, and straight into my brain. Clutching the fabric tight, squeezing it like a wet rag, wringing it in an attempt to extract every single drop of water, I return to North Dandry, back to the attic.

—

I went back downstairs, where I found my door still unlocked and the building silent. There was a ringing in my head and my body was tingling. When I entered the kitchen, I broke out in a sweat. Then it all went dark.

The first thing I became aware of was a melodious tolling of church bells. It surrounded me before I even opened my eyes. I listened for a while and realized it was St. Joseph’s across the street, summoning parishioners for Sunday Mass. The second thing I realized was that I had pulled Mia’s blanket over my shoulders. It barely covered my upper body but the solace it gave me was boundless.

I remained motionless on the cold tile until the buzzing in my head stopped. I sat up and realized I was covered in dust and feathers and other debris from the attic. As I picked off a plume stuck to my pants, I watched the rainbow-colored feather drift toward a narrow gap between the wall panel and the floor. Its downy barbs quivered in the draft, then it was sucked underneath the panel and it disappeared.

I scooted closer, blanket around my shoulders, and noticed the same persistent breeze that had sucked up the feather. The draft was so strong it made me shiver. I managed to get up off the ground, holding on to the countertop, but it took immense effort to stand up on my feet.

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